LIFE DOESN'T LOOK LIKE THE PROMISES IN YOUR COLLEGE BROCHURES.
I get it. I’ve been there, too. I’ve felt the disillusionment of realizing that this life...? This life they promised? It didn’t look like the brochure promises.
They told me the same thing they told you: follow the rules and play it safe. Except in my case, I didn’t even get the college brochures! I was expected to conform to the gender norms of my dad’s generation, when many people believed women didn’t need a college education.
I was told to stay in my lane - my gender lane, and to find a safe, secure office job.
I didn’t ask questions. I thought my dad’s generation had it all figured out. I assumed their age and experience gave them wisdom I did not have.
I did as I was told. I got a safe, secure job. I went to work every day. I moved papers around. I got paid. I stayed in my lane for years. And I was really good at it.
So why did my life feel so empty?
I started asking questions…
What is my purpose?
What effect do I have on others?
Can I make a difference in the world?
And I wondered.
I wondered what my life would have been like if I had been encouraged to listen to the small, still voice inside of me.
I wondered what my life would have been like if they had encouraged my dreams and supported my explorations.
And I wondered if it was too late.
It was not too late.
It was not too late to hit the pause button and think about my purpose. It was not too late to design my own life. It was not too late for a do over.
Only this time would be better because I now had my own accumulated wisdom of my own experience and my own insights.
Life has a way of throwing curve balls that can knock you off your base - some good, some bad. The beauty of those curve balls - even the bad ones - is that they offer you a chance to learn and grow and become the person you want to be.
There were a number of those curve balls in my life, the most profound being the joy of giving birth to my two daughters and the sorrow of losing my sister-in-law to cancer just two years after her diagnosis.
Life is lived in the space between these great joys and tremendous sorrows. Who did I want to be in that space?
I did some serious soul searching. Each book I read, every class I took, every retreat or workshop I attended brought me to a deeper understanding of myself, my relationship to others, and ultimately, my purpose in the world.
My soul searching also involved examining how my faith informs my purpose, which led to my life becoming more grounded in that faith.
When I realized that my values did not align with the corporate mission of my job, I left that safe, secure job and started working at a small, progressive church.
The work of the church is about finding your purpose and using your gifts for the good of the world. I discovered I have a gift for asking questions, the ones that help others stop and think and discover their own truth.
Not everyone will find their truth in faith. Each person has to take their own journey of discovery. You are capable of reading your own internal compass and deciding what values and vision guide your life. But I can help you find where you’re going faster and with greater clarity, whether or not faith is part of your journey.
Being a millennial life coach allows me to use my gifts to accompany others and help them discover how their experiences are shaping them for something greater than themselves.
I started over.
And so can you.
I love to read and discuss books, watch movies, travel, and take long walks with my dog. My favorite meal is popcorn and a glass of wine. I love other foods too, but I prefer that someone else cooks them.